It is not as a child that I believe and confess Jesus Christ. My hosanna is born of a furnace of doubt.
- Fyodor Dostoyevsky
Psalms in the Night…
With so many wonderful Biblical promises and powerful examples of God's interaction with mankind, see Psalms of Delight, Psalms in the Night are a way of exploring and sharing some of the difficult and challenging thoughts, feelings and experiences God's people encounter while endeavoring to fully enjoy His presence and power, protection and provision. In ever more genuine and meaningful ways. For themselves and their children, family and friends.
Psalms in the Night are written in concert with Psalms of Delight. Both series contain Modern Psalms meant to comfort and inspire those seeking the Omni-God revealed in Scripture.
Wilderness Summary
There are many kinds of wildernesses, some more welcoming than others. By definition the wilderness is wild, often inhospitable and barren. Just as such physical destinations can prove challenging and even deadly, so too feeling spiritually isolated from the presence, provision and/or protection of God can seem like wondering in a wasteland.
While the Bible reveals there are purposes for even arid cliffs and canyons, Scripture also promises, "Wilderness and desert will sing joyously, the badlands will celebrate and flower—God's resplendent glory, fully on display. God awesome, God majestic. Energize the limp hands, strengthen the rubbery knees. Tell fearful souls, 'Courage! Take heart! God is here, right here, on his way to put things right and redress all wrongs. He's on his way! He'll save you!' Blind eyes will be opened, deaf ears unstopped, Lame men and women will leap like deer, the voiceless break into song. Springs of water will burst out in the wilderness, streams flow in the desert. Hot sands will become a cool oasis, thirsty ground a splashing fountain."
Wilderness
Modern Psalm in the Night 21
Permission to speak freely, recognizing that asking’s not the same as receiving. What's up with You and the wilderness? With all the majestic mountain tops and wooded forests, gentle valleys and refreshing coastlines at Your disposal, why do so many feel like spiritual nomads and wonderers when it comes to our relationship?
Lord, I don't mind telling You, we're really not attracted to rocky bareness. Sure there's a simplistic charm and even rustic beauty but You realize they're called "wildernesses" for a reason? By definition they're unpleasant. Lonely and desolate, difficult and even dangerous, they're simply inhospitable. Dry and bleak, painted deserts are nice on a postcard. They're fine to visit, but no one wants to be forced to live there.
Yet given the echoing silence and distance so often between us, that's just how millions if not billions feel when it comes to knowing You. You must feel it too. Scripture repeatedly warns You're a "jealous God" envious of our quality time together. It is true the wilderness does offer few distractions, except maybe trying to stay alive. But there's got to be better ways to arrange intimate moments without making us feel forlorn or forsaken. With all the glory, wisdom and power at Your disposal can't we find a better way to bridge the chasm between us?
I have to admit modern society's at fault, having all but cut You out of our schedule. Forgetting we're fearfully and wonderfully made, in countless ways we've denied Your parental rights as Creator and Savior. We've taken much for granted, including previously unimaginable blessings, that as often as not we misuse. HDTV, hundreds of cable channels and Blue Ray have inched You out. Some attend Church, scheduling You for a few hours a month, but most of these rarely read, much less study, the Bible. Serious prayer's a lost art, for the most part downgraded to wishful thinking. And with temptation now sin rampant, including the greatest sins in the history of mankind, obeying Your commands is quickly becoming a thing of the past.
It's understandable that You'd be deeply disappointed in my generation. For the first time You given humanity the technology to glimpse the glory of Your creation and yet fewer and fewer are even willing to acknowledge You're existence, must less seek You diligently. Our brightest minds due violence to their own scientific method by concocting intricate theories denying intelligent design in the face of overwhelming evidence of Your miraculous fine tuning of creation. Yet Lord, in some ways isn't this an emotional reaction to feeling isolated from and even abandoned by You?
Of course, You wonderfully provided first Your Son, and them Your Spirit, to more than fill the void in the human heart. Moved by Divine mercy and love, at unfathomable cost Jesus's incarnation and atonement bridged the gap between Heaven and Earth. With incredible signs and wonders You established the Church at Pentecost, filling ordinary people with the fire of Your presence and power. From Emmanuel, God with us, to the Promise of the Father, God in us, Your plan to have relationship with man is perfect.
But Lord, the 1st century flame You lit seems to be flickering and going out right before our eyes. Like the Five Foolish Virgins, our lamps are running out of oil yet few are willing to admit it and fewer still are troubled enough to do something about it. From my studied yet puny perspective it seems modern Christianity's broken. When I compare the Churchianity we have today with the hopeful promise of Biblical Christianity we come up way short in every department.
Our spiritual powerlessness is the giant elephant in the room that no one but Your detractors take seriously. Atheists use our impotence as evidence You don't exist and agnostics to prove You're too transcendent to bother with mankind. The worldly call us hypocrites, pointing to our unbelief and sin to justify their own. Beautiful stained glass windows and intimate worship choruses aside, Earth's in a lot of trouble. And if we're buckling now during the most prosperous time in human history, what's in store when judgment and tribulation hits?
Like countless millions, I've been a desert bedouin for decades. Yet unlike most, I've put tens of thousands of hours into seeking and serving You with little or nothing to show for it. Sure there's been insights, but many have been dreadful, like the terrible truth about abortion and what murdering a billion babies has and will cost society and church. Clearly understanding the impact of such sin on prayer, worship and even salvation's of infinite worth, but the cost of such knowledge's been staggering. Worse, it appears even my modest gains have been short lived, evaporating like mirages.
Studying Scripture I couldn't help but notice the reoccurring themes of wilderness experiences and dark nights of the soul. In the Old Testament there's Satan stealing Job's wealth and slaying his children, destroying his health and hope over a bet You instigated. For about a century Noah built an ark only to watch all but a handful of people drown before his eyes. Then there's Abraham's isolated sojourn and his long awaiting Isaac. Fancying himself a deliverer, Prince Moses fled Egypt only to find himself herding sheep in the wild forty years. When the Exodus finally came, a generation lapped Sinai's Wilderness of Sin until they all dropped dead from unbelief. The psalmist David had to run to the Philistines for protection from Your people and then hide out in the Cave of Abdulum. Hosea married a prostitute to show how betrayal felt. Isaiah was forced to walk naked and barefoot three years as a sign of judgment and only to be sawed in half for his faithfulness. There's Habukkuk's complaint and Jeremiah lamenting a river of tears, together unable to save Your people from destruction. You carried Ezekiel around by the hair, hog tying him on his side for a year as a warning of things to come.
After four centuries of pain and oppression, even when Your broke Your silence in the New Testament the wildernesses remained. There was the desolation of Israel's slavery and Rome's desecrating the Temple. For Elizabeth there were decades of bareness and for John the Baptist's a diet of locust. Above all, there was the humble birth, life and agonizing death of the King of Glory. Stephen's martyrdom and Paul's hundreds of scars demonstrated the spiritual wilderness Your people languished in. Peter's inverted crucifixion revealed the whole world was upside down. John's Revelation in a Patmos prison disclosed it was unjust jailers and sinners of all generations who faced earthly tribulation and eternal imprisonment.
Maybe I'm not reading this right, but it seems that both the righteous and the wicked often end up in the wilderness. For different reason of course, yet here we all are. Awaiting different outcomes to be sure, yet there seems to be little on no escaping the fact good, bad or indifferent there's a wilderness with our name on it.
Lord, speaking for myself, and perhaps billions of others, I'm not crazy about the way things are going. This can't really be Your plan, can it? Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to bite the Hand the created, feeds and judges me. I'm just asking for wisdom and praying for help like the Bible says we should. I'm banking on You, so thankful that scripture declares You're not willing that any should perish. Yet Lord, how many have, are and are about to unless something drastically changes?
Your word explains salvation's a team effort. Like St. Augustine noted, "Without God, man cannot. Without man, God will not." I have to believe we can do better than this. With Heaven and Hell on the line, Lord we must do better than this! Only You know how badly we need Your help. Won't You answer our prayers for revival, today! Jesus said, "if you being evil know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts (and the Spirit) to those who ask?" Well I'm asking, for about the ten thousandth time. It's a handful of days before Christmas 2009. Return the gifts of the Spirit to Your people that we might be the Church and do the work of God.
Lord, I inch towards Your Throne boldly, not only because our need's astronomical but because meeting it's Your idea. I'm not asking for anything but what the Bible's been inviting us to ask for over two millennia. With more than a thousand promises in Your wonderful Book I don't have to! Like Jerry Maguire, from the movie by the same name, all I'm asking is that You "help us help You" help us. If we need to repent, give us the gift of the repentance that You might pour out Your Spirit. And Lord, please remember, while You did lead Christ into the wilderness to be tempted by the Devil, it was only after the "heavens were opened and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and settling on him."
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